I’d like to call your attention to a subject that may make you wince. Hysterectomies in young women.
What, you say? Take away a young woman’s ability to have children? No. Never. What reason could a young woman have for not wanting children at some future date?
I’ll tell you. Because you don’t know everything.
There are thousands of young women out there struggling with undiagnosed endometriosis, uterine and extra uterine fibroids, PCOS, super heavy periods, uterine and extra uterine cysts, polyps, and various other problems that make their lives miserable. Women who have been diagnosed and reach out for help get medicines and pats on the head. It’ll go away, you say. You have to be kidding. Really? I’m calling bullcrapola here.
There are women out there who cannot fathom the thought of putting their bodies through a pregnancy, let alone raising children, and they are young – in their 20s and 30s. Some are even in their teens. They recoil at the very notion of being pregnant. They are not comfortable around children at all.
These women are not going to be mothers. They don’t want to be mothers. They don’t want children. And yet you persist in telling them that they will change their minds. Just give it time, you say, you’ll want to have children.
We’ve given it time. And it’s about time we talked seriously about your attitudes.
We are sick of being told our pains are in our heads. We are sick of you saying that endometriosis, fibroids, cysts and polyps are nothing. We are tired of hearing the drumbeat of ‘you-must-have-children’. We have struggled with our bodies for years, trying to stop our unmanageable periods and the hormonal pains and body problems that come with them. We’ve used every method we can get our hands on to try and feel normal. And the one method that might help is something you deny us because we are young. Hysterectomy.
Is it so hard to think that there are young women out there who a) don’t want children or b) have enough internal issues that having children would be a problem in itself? What do they teach you in those ivory tower medical schools?
This notion that we all want to be mothers has to go. And if a young woman comes to you and says she doesn’t want to have children and wants a hysterectomy, you should listen to her. And take her seriously.
Take us seriously, OB-GYNS out there. Because if you don’t start to, we will have to make you listen to the cacophony of our voices, our pain.